evandar: (Hidan)
Title: Between Lungs
Author: Evandar
Fandom: Naruto
Rating: R
Genre: Romance?
Warnings: Gore, dismemberment, body mutilation
Pairing: Kakuzu/Hidan
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and I am making no profit from this story.
Summary: He'll take Hidan's heart because it belongs to him.
AN: I'm not getting back into Naruto. I'm not, I'm not, I'm not. It was, however, the first thing I thought of when I saw the prompt 'Body horror/gore/dismemberment, taking out your love's heart to prove their devotion to you' on [livejournal.com profile] bloodyvalentine's 2014 Prompt List.

He's enjoying this... )
evandar: (Default)
Title: 1117
Author: Evandar
Fandom: Naruto
Rating: T - NC-17
Pairings: established Kakuzu/Hidan, future Kisame/Itachi and Sasori/Deidara
Genre: Humour
Warnings: AU, yaoi, swearing, details of the hospitality industry, and probably OOCness.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and I am making no profit from this story.
Summary: Backpacking through Cloud, Itachi runs out of money and runs out of luck. He ends up working for accommodation in a hostel, surrounded by crazy people and flagging hygiene standards. Good lord.
AN: This fic still amounts to therapy, and I know I've got two big bangs to worry about, but I'm writing? Also, Kou Nakagawa is the composer of the Geisha vs Ninja soundtrack.

If you start off knowing the absolute worst about someone, you can only ever be pleasantly surprised by them... )
evandar: (Deidara)
Title: 1117
Author: Evandar (yamievandar / hikarievandar)
Fandom: Naruto
Rating: T - NC-17
Pairings: established Kakuzu/Hidan, future Kisame/Itachi and Sasori/Deidara
Genre: Humour
Warnings: AU, yaoi, swearing, details of the hospitality industry, and probably OOCness.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and I am making no profit from this story.
Summary: Backpacking through Cloud, Itachi runs out of money and runs out of luck. He ends up working for accommodation in a hostel, surrounded by crazy people and flagging hygiene standards. Good lord.

Maybe he hallucinated the leg thing... )
evandar: (Hidan)
Title: 1117
Author: Evandar (yamievandar / hikarievandar)
Fandom: Naruto
Rating: T - NC-17
Pairings: established Kakuzu/Hidan, future Kisame/Itachi and Sasori/Deidara
Genre: Humour
Warnings: AU, yaoi, swearing, details of the hospitality industry, and probably OOCness.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and I am making no profit from this story.
Summary: Backpacking through Cloud, Itachi runs out of money and runs out of luck. He ends up working for accommodation in a hostel, surrounded by crazy people and flagging hygiene standards. Good lord.

Just one pool of puke? My heart bleeds... )
evandar: (Default)
Title: 1117
Author: Evandar (yamievandar / hikarievandar)
Fandom: Naruto
Rating: T - NC-17
Pairings: established Kakuzu/Hidan, future Kisame/Itachi and Sasori/Deidara
Genre: Humour
Warnings: AU, yaoi, swearing, details of the hospitality industry seriously, it needs a warning, and probably OOCness.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and I am making no profit from this story.
Summary: Backpacking through Cloud, Itachi runs out of money and runs out of luck. He ends up working for accommodation in a hostel, surrounded by crazy people and flagging hygiene standards. Good lord.
AN: So, this is basically my life - the anecdotes, the insanity, the situation. Obviously, I'm not using real names and obviously it's been put into a fanfic format and I'll be trying to keep people in character as much as possible. I just need the therapy.

He’s breaking into his last two hundred dollars. The thought makes him want to curl up in a ball and weep, but he hands the money over without so much as a wince... )
evandar: (Hidan)
Title: Something...Old
Author: Evandar (yamievandar / hikarievandar)
Fandom: Naruto
Rating: T
Pairing: Kakuzu/Hidan
Genre: Romance
Warnings: Swearing, yaoi...not nmuch else, really.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and I am making no profit from this story.
Summary: Four Akatsuki ficlets based on the old marriage rhyme.
AN: OMFG I ACTUALLY WROTE SOMETHING! *dies* Apparently backpacking round New Zealand and endless hours of boredom sitting on a bus filled with other (more hungover) backpackers is kind of inspiring. Or something. Yeah.

Also, this works with my head canon way better than with anything Kishimoto actually wrote about either of these characters (which, to be fair, wasn't much). So there.

...really, when you were immortal, ‘til death do you part’ took on a whole new meaning... )
evandar: (Madara)
Title: What If They...
Author: Evandar (yamievandar / hikarievandar)
Fandom: Naruto
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: None
Genre: Gen
Warnings: AU liek WOAH, Hidan's mouth
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and I am making no profit from this story.
Summary: The Akatsuki never went missing-nin.
AN: Written for the What if? Meme on [livejournal.com profile] naruto_meme for the prompt: what would have happened if the Akatsuki never went missing-nin.

Madara, Kakuzu, Sasori, Kisame, Pein, Konan, Zetsu, Deidara, Hidan, Itachi... )
evandar: (Madara)
Title: Breathe
Author: Evandar (yamievandar / hikarievandar)
Fandom: Naruto
Rating: R
Pairing: Kakuzu/Madara, Shodai/Madara
Genre: Angst
Warnings: Mild smut, timeline twisting
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and I am making no profit from this story.
Summary: Senju Hashirama lies dying after the fight at The Valley of the End, Madara doesn't know how to say goodbye, and Kakuzu is just there.
AN: This was written for the Anonymous Naruto Kink Meme. It was much delayed in being written, but oh well. It was weird writing Kakuzu with someone who wasn't Hidan. >.>;

Only Madara would dare to kiss someone holding a kunai to his throat... )
evandar: (Hidan)
Title: Ghost Town
Author: Evandar (yamievandar / hikarievandar)
Fandom: Naruto
Rating: PG-13/R
Pairing: None
Characters: Kakuzu and Hidan.
Genre: Weird General
Warnings: Fairly mild descriptions of gore and a lot of guesswork regarding Kakuzu and Hidan's pasts.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and I am making no profit from this story.
Summary: On a mission to Earth Country, Kakuzu stumbles across the remains of Yuugakure.
AN: It's odd. Ah well, I wrote through writers' block.

It was the only ‘nation’ left in the Shinobi continent that still had Jashinism as the official religion, which showed just how much of a pathetic little backwater the village actually was... )
evandar: (Hidan)
Title: Cheap Imitation
Author: Evandar (yamievandar / hikarievandar)
Fandom: Naruto
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Kakuzu/Hidan
Genre: Romance/Horror
Warnings: Swearing, cannibalism, death, yaoi
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and I am making no profit from this story.
Summary: She was just a cheap imitation, but Hidan got jealous anyway.
AN: Don't ask. I thought of this while in the shower. Personally, I'm blaming reading too much Poppy Z. Brite.

He woke up wet... )
evandar: (Hidan)
Title: Poisoning
Author: Evandar (yamievandar / hikarievandar)
Fandom: Naruto
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Kakuzu/Hidan preslash
Genre: AU Gen
Warnings: Swearing
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and I am making no profit from this story.
Summary: Kakuzu's choice in restaurant ends in food poisoning. Hidan should have known it would happen one day.
AN: This is based off an RP that [livejournal.com profile] waitingforvira and I had going a while back.

There was something terribly depressing about hunting squirrel in the rain... )

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