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Title: Regret
Author: Evandar
Fandom: Harry Potter
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst
Pairings: Sirius Black/Antonin Dolohov, Remus Lupin/?
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and am making no profit from this story.
Summary: Remus' wedding preparations bring a question to Harry's mind, but there are some things he really doesn't want to know the answer to.
Author's Notes: This was written for![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
hogwarts365's Prompt 25.
“Have you ever thought about getting married?”
Sirius snorted at the question and – at first – didn’t answer. He kept watching Mrs Weasley lecture Remus on the vital importance of the correct flower arrangements for the table centrepieces, and he frowned, chewing his lip.
“Once,” he said after a while. “You don’t want to know.”
Harry raised his eyebrows. “Come on, Sirius. Tell me. Take your best shot.”
Sirius shook his head. “I was proposed to twice,” he said. “The first time, I said ‘hell no’ and that was that. The second time…fuck, this is awkward. You really want to know?”
Harry just nodded. All this fuss over Remus’ impending wedding had brought it up and he hadn’t been able to get it out of his head. He’d seen pictures of his godfather as a young man and, while he was still handsome, he’d been gorgeous before Azkaban. And yet…he hadn’t ever mentioned anyone.
“Antonin Dolohov,” Sirius said.
Harry choked. “The Death Eater? Are you…what? How?”
Sirius nodded. “We met after I finished school. Had a bit of a whirlwind romance while I was in Auror training and he was working for Gringotts.” He flashed Harry a crooked smile that didn’t meet his eyes. “Lots of sex.”
Harry wrinkled his nose and shoved his godfather in the arm. “What happened?”
“We split up. We had a conflict of interest – pretty obvious one, really. He was a Death Eater and I wasn’t. In the end I had the choice of him or the Order – your parents, Remus, Frank and Alice.” Sirius sighed and looked away again, in Remus’ direction but not, Harry thought, at him. There was something sad and distant in Sirius’ eyes, and Harry rested his head against Sirius’ shoulder in a silent apology. He shouldn’t have asked, and Sirius had been right about him not wanting to know. Dolohov had died horribly, caught between curses from Snape and Bill Weasley. He’d been barely recognisable when they were done, but it had been Sirius who identified him after the battle.
“It wasn’t as easy as it should have been,” Sirius admitted quietly. “Saying goodbye to him was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.”
Author: Evandar
Fandom: Harry Potter
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst
Pairings: Sirius Black/Antonin Dolohov, Remus Lupin/?
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and am making no profit from this story.
Summary: Remus' wedding preparations bring a question to Harry's mind, but there are some things he really doesn't want to know the answer to.
Author's Notes: This was written for
hogwarts365's Prompt 25.“Have you ever thought about getting married?”
Sirius snorted at the question and – at first – didn’t answer. He kept watching Mrs Weasley lecture Remus on the vital importance of the correct flower arrangements for the table centrepieces, and he frowned, chewing his lip.
“Once,” he said after a while. “You don’t want to know.”
Harry raised his eyebrows. “Come on, Sirius. Tell me. Take your best shot.”
Sirius shook his head. “I was proposed to twice,” he said. “The first time, I said ‘hell no’ and that was that. The second time…fuck, this is awkward. You really want to know?”
Harry just nodded. All this fuss over Remus’ impending wedding had brought it up and he hadn’t been able to get it out of his head. He’d seen pictures of his godfather as a young man and, while he was still handsome, he’d been gorgeous before Azkaban. And yet…he hadn’t ever mentioned anyone.
“Antonin Dolohov,” Sirius said.
Harry choked. “The Death Eater? Are you…what? How?”
Sirius nodded. “We met after I finished school. Had a bit of a whirlwind romance while I was in Auror training and he was working for Gringotts.” He flashed Harry a crooked smile that didn’t meet his eyes. “Lots of sex.”
Harry wrinkled his nose and shoved his godfather in the arm. “What happened?”
“We split up. We had a conflict of interest – pretty obvious one, really. He was a Death Eater and I wasn’t. In the end I had the choice of him or the Order – your parents, Remus, Frank and Alice.” Sirius sighed and looked away again, in Remus’ direction but not, Harry thought, at him. There was something sad and distant in Sirius’ eyes, and Harry rested his head against Sirius’ shoulder in a silent apology. He shouldn’t have asked, and Sirius had been right about him not wanting to know. Dolohov had died horribly, caught between curses from Snape and Bill Weasley. He’d been barely recognisable when they were done, but it had been Sirius who identified him after the battle.
“It wasn’t as easy as it should have been,” Sirius admitted quietly. “Saying goodbye to him was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.”
